Saying Hello

Some have said i am weird.
Others believe i might just be misunderstood.
But that is their opinion.Nobody knows ME the way I know ME.
so far i have been on an incredible journey.
Even i wonder where i get the strength to go on atimes.I am a classic case of a tortured soul.I try to be happy,but there is always a "BUT".let us just say that if another person who knew my story were to title it,it would be called "ALL THAT GLITTERS SURE AS HELL AIN'T GOLD".

i look like i have it all,like i have it together,but deep inside,i am bruised,torn,atimes i heal,atimes the wounds keep opening up.i try to maintain this expected balance so i dont tip over the edge or offend God.because atimes i don't even understand who God really is,or what he truly wants.BUT i am still trying to stay on that fine line.i took a couple of online tests to determine my state of mind.even I was scared at the results.

diva,difficult,sweet,endearing,nice to a fault,bitchy,caring,ice-queen,hard,wears her heart on her sleeves,these are just a few words those near and dear to me have used in describing me.
i could be like a pandoras box,you just don't know what will pop out,BUT its not always bad.

i recently moved home,and finally discovered that i have a bad case of O.C.D.it just was never obvious in the past.or maybe because my family never let me know?

Why the name Crouching Angel?
BECAUSE ONE DAY AFTER I FEEL HEALED AND HAPPY..FINALLY HAPPY,I WILL STAND TALL WITH MY WINGS INTACT ALL 5 FEET 6 INCHES OF ME.BECAUSE LIFES JOURNEYS AND SOME PATHS I HAVE WALKED HAVE LEFT ME CROUCHING WITH MY WINGS BRUISED AND BATTERED.

atimes i love people,atimes i know for sure that when i am wealthy enough,i would love to buy an island and give a very few people a pass to reach me.No,people just dont do it for me.maybe because i have come across a very very few nice ones.take my mum,dad and siblings out of the equation, and we have even lesser number of nice people left.


With this blog i just hope to bare my soul,and write and write,i love to write.and i write from my heart.Yes i do.i dont even know what form this blog will take.because my life is just a mix of so much,growing up,love,daily trials,poems,deaths,etc.

Yes,i have done things i am ashamed of,hurt people i love,said stuff i shouldnt have.who knows my blog might touch the heart of one or two people i hurt in the past and they might pick up and say hello.and maybe those who deeply hurt me too might recognise me and apologise.

I dont know what i love most,writing or shoes.when i was moving i had twelve boxes for my shoes.


i drift a lot,thats why i find church so hard,when i'm trying to pray all the noise coming from different angles makes it hard for me to concentrate.so i lose focus and cannot just get on with my own business.so i stick to talking to God in my own way.i cry,i shout,i swear,i laugh,joke with him.atimes he responds,atimes i'm like W.T.F,better show YOUR face now or else...
in moments of pain and anger,i have tried to ask the devil for help(because i felt God was failing)--and i have been to a deliverance session and NO i am not possessed.i have tried been a bhuddist,catholic,dabbled into ancient religions.BUT i always keep coming back to God.
ALMOST every religious elder has said the same thing about me.CHILD YOU WILL SERVE THE LORD IN A BIG CAPACITY.
how?even i dont know.
considering i have only been to church like four times this year.


thats part of me in a nutshell.the rest you will learn from my blog.
and yeah,i hate cats,eggs,and believe it or not,the @ sign on a keyboard,freaks me out if it shows up more than once in an email or anything.

read on......

***P.S,,,,some of you might know who i am,and be surprised at what i go through etc.
BUT I ONLY ASK ONE FAVOR,IF YOU REALLY DO KNOW ME,PLEASE THERE IS A REASON WHY I WANT TO STAY ANNONYMOUS.SO I WOULD ASK FOR THAT LITTLE BIT OF PRIVACY.READ,LEARN FROM MY EXPERIENCES,LAUGH AT ME,TEACH ME,DO WHATEVER YOU MAY.BUT PLEASE DO NOT BLOW MY COVER.

GIVE ME THAT POWER TO DO IT IN MY OWN TIME.BECAUSE I WILL.ONE DAY I WILL.

Crouching Angel